Mistakes Moms of Boys Make...part 3

Ok, this will be my last blog post in the series. I think. I could write more but I can't find the time to sit and think clearly lately since I'm too busy raising my boys (and daughter) right now! Moms of preschool and younger-it seems busy now, but just wait! School and relational issues and loss of innocence in small (and big) things take up WAY more mental time than playing, bathing, feeding. Trust me on this! So, enjoy the hectic pace now because it picks up even more! hahaha! (But I'm not kidding!)

So, here are the last 3 mistakes I want to address and hope that if, like me, you've made these mistakes without realizing it or wanting to admit it, this will be encouraging. Encouraging because if something is askew we can set it straight. But if something "is what it is", well...what can we do? Which leads me to mistake #1

1. Excusing sin. We do it all the time out of embarrassment, pride, or even a desire to protect our children from the reality of their suckiness. We call it "tired" instead of greedy and disobedient when our 2-year-old goes "kuku for coco puffs" at the store and throws a fit if you don't buy them. We call it shy when our 3 year-old is rude and disrespectful and won't answer the greeting of friends who come over to visit. We call it "picky" instead of rude and ungrateful when our 4 year old proclaims how disgusting the food is your friend made for dinner. Our 7-year-old is “sensitive” instead of manipulative and cowardly during his crying fits. Is your 9-year-old lazy and acting like a sluggard or he just "too busy" to do chores and study for tests? And maybe you say your teenager is just "having a hard day" when he totally disrespects you and blows off your questions. Yep, we're full of excuses for our kids' sin. The problem with this mistake is that we are being foolish to squander this opportunity to lead our kids to Christ. Romans says that if we confess our sins, God is faithful and just to forgive us! Halleluiah- we have an answer for sin. Jesus! If you need help identifying sinful patterns in your kids and finding verses to lead them to repentance, please read this book

2. Setting our kids up for failure. This is basically the opposite of #1. We do this when we neglect our kids’ needs for our own selfish reasons. An over-tired and hungry son will be cranky and prone to sin-just like we are! So while you might want to run that extra errand, your 2-year-old can’t! Or when you constantly discipline for the words and behaviors you fill his little 8-year-old mind with from the TV shows you neglectfully let him watch without checking the content, you set him up to fail. If your 11-year-old son is allowed to hang out with the cussing, smoking, disrespectful group down the block, don’t wonder why he’s acting the same way. 1 Corinthians 15:33 says, “Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals”.
3. Not being consistent. Be thoughtful and decide what you will say NO to. And then stick with it! If your son is constantly whining at you to change your mind about something you told him no to (more TV time, more food, going to the park, spending the night at a friend’s house, etc.) it is because it woks! He has gotten his way before and will try and try again. If some negative behavior gets a spank sometimes and not others, kids will take their chances. So, be consistent.

There is a lot of wisdom to be gained from reading the Proverbs and all of scripture as to how we order our days-including relationships, food, etc. Apply that wisdom to your children's lives, too!

Ok, this is the last blog on the practical, how-to stuff. Any questions or comments? I’d love some feedback from you…. :)

And I think I will do one more on the source of our strength and wisdom so we do not become prideful if we do it "right' or despairing if we can't "live up".